Surprise, surprise! We now have a new van for our cache runs. Through some creative financing we were able to purchase another. Nothing illegal, but trust me... you don't want to know! This one is only 3 years old and has enough bells and whistles to be in a parade. It's not ammo can green, but a silver colored ammo can isn't unheard of either. I may still make the big yellow Etrex and log for this one. (Vic is still shaking her head over that idea.) You may have noticed I haven't referred to it as Van Camp II or a replacement yet. It will have to earn that title, although with a CD player, DVD player, steering wheel mounted sound controls, Stow and Go seats and better gas mileage, it probably won't take too long to earn the pair of  I's. We have moved the bug to the new van but haven't updated the description yet. You'll hear when we do though.

We've taken it on a few day trips so far and it has worked out well. We have two days off work together soon so it's time to do a cache-n-camp trip. A new cache had been published near us, an 'alphanumeric by cacher's name' challenge. Vic checked our finds and discovered that we had all but four numbers and a U to find. I guess it's only right; for the last challenge we needed a Q and U follows a Q. So we set out trying to track down caches placed by cachers whose names begin with those numbers and letters. Not an easy task! I went to the forums to ask advice on how to do that and it was suggested I look into the forum's registered user's list. Certainly not all inclusive but definitely a good start. Hoping to narrow the field to the closest ones, I also joined the forums of most of the neighboring states. What we found is that there are two of the numbers we need nearby (each within 30 miles), but the closest U was near Waterloo Iowa. We had a four-day weekend coming up and originally planned to go south in Nebraska and work on the County challenge, but since it would be quicker to finish this challenge Vic decided to cross the river (Missouri). Then I talked her into crossing another river (Mississippi) to add 2 states to our US map You all know how I did it. "Gee we're so close now and if we have to come out another time it will mean more gas and miles, etc." It really helped that gas prices had plummeted almost as fast as the stock market.

What do we need to do to get ready? Window coverings! No screwed on Velcro this time, so after a failed attempt to make custom shades (I'll try again!) I settle on some really big, RV size wire frame sunscreens and a long piece of the old familiar plaid (once again I sacrifice my future kilt) to drape over the front dash and get caught up in the windows. We try it out and it seems to work ok for us. That taken care of, I do the whole caches along a route thing, experimenting a bit with my applications and find out that I can color code unique pushpins for each of the cache sizes when I put them in Streets and Trips. Now we'll know if we are coming up on a micro or a regular or an EarthCache well before we get there. It helps a lot on planning our stops and hunts along the way. We also decide that we would take Wedge, our dog, along on this trip, so we had to make preparations for her as well. Things go pretty smoothly getting ready, maybe we really are learning as we go!

It was a drizzly, misty, spitty, sprinkle of a day. At least the sun isn't in your eyes while driving on a day like this. The car was packed, fuel topped off, ready to roll. Déjà Vu!! Only difference this time is that it is much colder and we're heading east, with a dog in the back of a van. We have a relatively aggressive (for us) agenda for this trip. Pick up number nine, find the U cache, and visit six or more Earthcaches to qualify for the platinum pin and whatever we wanted to hunt along the way. I had about 280 caches loaded in the GPS' and Palms, so we had lots of possible hunts to divert us.

Routing specifically along the highways instead of the interstate, our side trips would be a little easier and it was a quicker route as well. Swinging through a small town and then down the highway towards a roadside park, for our first cache of the day. After a quick search I find the Altoids container, but the camo surrounding it held several small brown ugly little spiders which I just happened to notice before pulling the container out.

Finding a twig to persuade the little buggers to depart, I remove the tin and find two more reclusive little fellows underneath it... and I was now nervous about opening the tin. Setting it on the hood of the van, studying it from various angles, and deciding upon a plan of action, I take the tin in hand and gingerly, using two fingers to hold the bottom and two fingers to raise the lid, quickly pop it open and drop it, letting the contents spill out. Hmm damp log, pencil, a few beads, nope no spiders. Whew, sign the log, replace it in the camo and rehide it. I felt kind of foolish treating it like a bomb squad operation, but if Vic hadn't been walking Wedge and had been the one to find the cache, you could have heard the scream for a radius of 30 miles and then I would have had to play shining knight and fight the vicious spiders bare handed or something like that.

Just a bit further down the road we all get out to search for the only numbered cacher's name cache we find on this trip. Walking up a hill past a small field of crosses, Wedge sniffs this one out and we were quite surprised; she had never done that before. We'll have to test her newly-discovered ability. The next cache we sought we let Wedge lead the way, but she didn't sniff it out. In her defense, it was strung up in a tree well out of her reach. Walking back along the trail Vic wants to test Wedge on something else and takes her leash off.

Now, I have spent many frustrating hours in the past chasing housedogs that had gotten loose and wouldn't come when called, so I wasn't real happy at what Vic had just done. Wedge loves to run and she also loves to "strafe" people at the dog park, the only place we have let her run free before. She will run off, turn and run straight back at us and pass within a foot either side and then repeat those actions till she tires out, occasionally involving other innocent bystanders in her game. Now off the leash, she tears off out of sight, but comes back towards us when Vic calls her. Off again, call and she comes back. Wow, a dog that I don't have to chase! She has really made us proud of her so far this trip.

We go on to collect a few more caches as we wind our way towards the Waterloo area and the nearby EarthCaches. There are 2 erratics and a gorge that we will visit here. We find the first erratic without too much trouble, take our pics and measurements and observations then follow the map to the next EC. The road we need to take is all torn up so we need to find an alternate route. Finally finding a way around (Streets and Trips had frozen up) we pull up to the next set of erratics and start gathering our information and taking pics.

Then we saw an individual walking toward us, and it had one eye, no mouth but bulges on its cheeks. The hair stood up along Wedges back and she began growling and barking at this alien and really went nuts when 2 more of these creatures came to join the first.

As I held onto Wedge trying to control her, the first individual had reached up and started to remove a hood and pulled off those bulging cheeks.

It wasn't an alien after all, and Wedge began that happy-tail dance when she figured out that it was a young woman. Pet me! Pet me! 

Now Vic's curiosity was piqued and she approached the woman and asked why she was wearing the respirator and suit. The reply was "You're not from around here, are you?" Cue ominous music...  "Should we be leaving?? Really fast?" as visions of Ebola-carrying chipmunks or a trainload of anhydrous spilling, filled our minds. "No, you're ok. We're cleaning up after the spring floods, the house up there and the machine shed both had eight foot of water in them. You can still see the high water mark on the shed." At that time the others began taking off their protective gear and they were also young women.

We finished at the EarthCache, and once again tried to find our way around the street closure to find the Gorge we would visit next. Pulling up to a stop sign, we wait for an approaching vehicle on the cross street but the car opposite us didn't and pulled out. Squeal and crunch as the van with the right of way, t-boned the car and both drifted directly towards us. "NO, NO" was the only thought on both our minds "please please please don't hit the new van!" The car stopped about a foot short of us and we got out making sure everyone was ok. The passenger in the car had a minor injury and the emergency call was made. Minutes later we were converged upon from all directions by police, firemen and paramedics and more police. After a few moments, a woman police officer took our drivers license numbers, a short statement and a contact number, and then we were allowed to continue along our way.

Hmmm the officer looked familiar. I had a fleeting mental picture of her removing a respirator and shaking out her hair?? Did I? What was that long grey object in the middle of the torn-up street. Why would HAZMAT cleaners all be young attractive women with long hair that belongs in a shampoo commercial? Why was Wedge wagging her tail so excitedly for strangers? Had that officer done more than take our license numbers? I don't know, I don't remember it clearly. And if I ask Vic about it, she gets a faraway look on her face and with a hint of a smile; she says "You mean those buff college boys cleaning the flooded house?"

Moving on to the next EarthCache, we follow a line of milk jug luminaries to the gorge and a boardwalk where we enjoy the view and estimate distances for our logging info. Beautiful place, I would like to see it in the springtime.

Having a strangely stressful feeling with no apparent reason we decide to call it a day, and head north to the campground we would be staying at, since the nearby campground was closed. Hmm, why was it closed?

Things were definitely strange around here.

Pulling into the park, we take a look around and choose a spot near the middle of the campground. Wedge gets staked out and fed dinner while we unload, stow the seats and make up our bed for the evening. It's almost dark as we finish draping the fabric and trying to secure the sunscreens in the right spots.

Wedge barks a lot if we both walk away from her so we tag teamed a visit to the showers while one of us kept the dog company. I swing the beam of a flashlight around for Wedge to chase as Vic takes her turn first.

My turn, and when I am halfway back to the van Wedge comes at me full tilt on a strafing run and heads past into the darkness. While being transferred from the stake out to the van, one of the sunscreens fell over and had spooked her. We spent the next 20 minutes trying to get her back but she was like a pilot doing touch-and-goes. Shrooom....Shroom. Smart enough to know that if she came too close her flight would be ended, she strafed us at a distance just out of reach. Finally with a food bribe, while she was panting heavily, we managed to get her to sit long enough to hook her leash.

As we settle in for the night we take notes on improvements or corrections we will need to make for the next trip. Different shade system, a grounded extension cord, an air mattress under the futon cushion, tinfoil etc. With the dog Wedged between us (she has earned her name) we drift off to sleep. 

Next morning we feed the dog, pack up and head out, then stop just outside the campground to unload onto the soggy gravel road and repack to eliminate the load shifting and scaring the dog. Grr, we already had enough of scared dog for this trip.

Our early-morning goal today was to find a McDonalds for breakfast, coffee and wireless and then on to gather up the U cache. Twenty-some miles, two small towns (obviously too small), a DNF on the first U cache, smiley claimed on the next U, a few more miles, and another erratic EarthCache, we finally locate a McD's with no internet, where the counter person didn't know they served sausage, egg and cheese bagels. Two and a half hours after we set out this morning, we finally ate our breakfast while planning our next stops.

The next goal was to cross the Misipi , the Missississpi, Mippississi, darn it! The other big river, Mississippi! That's it! Anyhow we plan to go over a bridge and find a cache in Wisconsin before heading south for a cache in Illinois and then come back over the Mippississi (that's kind of a fun sounding word, I think I'll use it). We figured to use a bridge coming back as well but just because there aren't many other options unless the aliens give us a lift.

Have I mentioned that ever since last night, Wedge would be laying down in the van while we're driving, then suddenly pop up and stare at the floor while cocking her head to one side, almost as if she was hearing voices? I guess I would be more worried if she were staring at the roof. Hmm, if she keeps this up, we may have to hit a grocery store for supplies to make an IAWA (Improvised Alien Warding Apparel, i.e. "tin foil hat") for Wedge.

Crossing the bridge and taking pics of the barges and rail span, we quickly find the first Wisconsin rest stop and decide to have lunch there after claiming our smiley. I was a bit disappointed though as there was no cheese in sight, not even on my sandwich. How am I supposed to take nothing down and pass it around?

Venturing south, without singing, to park along the roadside in Illinois we scale the hill to the bug motel that would color in more territory for our stats. Wedge stopped on the trail with her hackles rising along her back, growling as she faced the hillside. I look around nervously not knowing what to expect and spy the subject of Wedge's attention. It was a squirrel! No aliens here. After a few minutes search we find the cache and return to the van stopping only to take pics of hobbit holes and moss growing on rail ties in strange star shaped patterns.

Backtracking to the interstate, we drive across the Mippississi River. Spotting a big sign, it suddenly dawns on me, we had been warned! Investigating Our Waterloo, Aliens! And they Welcomed that! "Holy acronyms Vic, we had best get some distance in!" so we route ourselves south to catch I-80 and the corridor home.

Aliens or not, we would not be deterred from the Earthcaches that would qualify us for the Platinum EarthCache Master level. Our next destination fit into this trip almost as if it were scripted for 'The Twilight Zone'; "Orthoceras: Grew Feet Out of Its Head."

Passing a tranquil, pastoral scene of a churchyard with a beautiful view, we round the bend into another time.

Armed with hammers, we are hunting the elusive foot-headed nautiloids and scrambling over scree-covered slopes to find them hidden among the rocks.

Taking our trophy and documenting our successful hunt with photographs, we return to our van. Thanks For The EarthCache! E-mail has been sent!

Maquoketa State Park was the location of 2 more EC's, the Maquoketa Caves, and Iowa's Balanced Rock. Vic's eyes lit up when she first saw the entrance to the 'Dance Hall' and the three of us descended into the subterranean realm.

It was a good thing that the "Dance Hall' had electric lights because I don't know if the glow from Vic's eyes would have illuminated our way.

Uh, this is really getting bizarre.

Following the underground stream, we wind our way to the other side, emerging once again to see the overcast drizzly sky. "That was really cool! Let's go back through it!" Vic said and we did, even allowing Wedge, against my better judgment, to drink from the stream this time.

After all of the strange things that had been occurring I pictured Wedge turning into some sort of were-pit bull from drinking the cave water.

As we continued along, we came to a spot where the concrete path ended and was replaced with stepping stones about 12 inches apart to allow the stream to pass through. At that point Wedge stumbled some and almost went into the water before recovering herself. I should have known she would make it though...... Were-bulls wobble but they don't fall down. (I'm really sorry for that one... No, I'm not!) Climbing the rain-slicked stairway we go on to locate the Balanced Rock and return to the van before my overactive imagination dreams up some alien use and cause for a big rock to be positioned on end like that.

That was the last cache of the day and we were homeward bound on I-80. Past dinner time, we stop at Little Amana to grab some food and walk Wedge. Little Amana is one of the colonies.....Colonies?? I don't even want to think of the acronym derived from Amana but there are far too many A's for none of them to be "alien"  Gaaah,...... they make radar-ranges! Where is my tinfoil??

Well after dark on the second day of our 4 day weekend, we return to the safety of our home on Nebraska soil. Like most of our adventures, we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves, learned a few things and logged an EarthCache or two.

P.S. No Iowa's, Amana's or ammonites were meant to be offended by this story. If offense was taken, please give it back as some things aren't meant to be taken out of context.

By catsnfish

A couple of empty-nesters who caught the caching bug not realizing it was incurable. So if we’re found in the woods waltzing with Garmins, lifting lampskirts while tying our shoe or looking for “gum” underneath benches, be sure to stay away... it’s contagious and the only temporary relief can be found in finding bison’s, ammo’s, nano’s, or passing coins and spreading travel bugs!

Publisher's Note: Catsnfish write the periodic column The Adventures of Catsnfish. Subscribe (free) to The Online Geocacher to get an email alert when a new article is published.